In week 4 in writing we had to finish our story from last week and this is my story is about a elf who loses her family in a plane crash, after the most shy pixie comes and asks her if she wants her......... you should read the story your self for now no more spoilers. After you read my story tell me in the comments if you like it or if I should change something so I can improve my next story.
Friendship story by Me
Saturday, May 9, 2020
2 comments:
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Hi Eduarda
ReplyDeleteWhat a great story! After reading the first part I thought you were going to say that Thelma's parents had been saved. So when you said that it didn't work I was shocked, and quite sad for Thelma. Then, when she gets adopted by Twinkle's family I felt really happy, and this was an unexpected ending. Well done!
I would like you to spend a bit of time working on the punctuation in your story, and I will give you some help with this next week at school.
Great work Eduarda!
- Mr Mitchell
Hey Mr, Sorry about the punctuation I didn't really check on that but in my next stories i'll make sure they are with better punctuation because punctuation is not really my strength.
Delete-Eduarda